Maggie's Madcap Life

update

2011-08-20T04:28:00.000-07:00

Hey, I think I will post more often and this poor neglected blog. I created a gmail account back in January when I traded in my Blackberry phone for an Android phone. This resulted in me being logged into my browser whit my gmail account but I would have to log off and log back in whit the email account I created this blog with. It was a pain.

So anyways, here is my update... When I was first notified that my job was being eliminated, I had a lot of co-worker express dismay and a lot of people calling their favorite recruiters on my behalf. I even had an interview two weeks out as well as a possible contract job. So I felt like I'd be "doing" something soon. But the Contract job fell through. The interview was for a sales position, but we expect some technical sl;aes support positions to open up in the third quarter that you'd be perfect for. " (yeah, I know, there is still 5-6 weeks left in the quarter.)

Three weeks ago I attended a job search networking group. The once a week meetings have interesting topics but I have to be careful because there are a lot of people who have been there for a long time and you can almost see the Eeyore-type rainy cloud hanging above their heads. I have been fortunate enough to meet with some expert networking and have friends contact me with job openings. So it is a hurry up and wait situation. Guess what, I am not very good at waiting.

I am blessed to have a paycheck through November and my husband is still working so we can maintain shelter, food, clothing and transportation.

Upside down

2011-07-20T11:29:00.000-07:00

Almost 4 weeks ago I was led into a conference room and informed that my position was being abolished due to budget cuts and the University where I was working. While I was blind-sided by the announcement, logically it made sense. The system that my team worked on did not really need three of us to maintain it. A year ago I was campaigning to get another system as part of my responsibilities. Obviously I was unsuccessful. I did leave with people telling me they were sorry - and I believed them, and 5 months of my continues paycheck and benefits.

So initially there was a lot of momentum moving forward to find a new job. I reached out to my network and got a lot of positive feedback. I had an interview 2 weeks later. I even had a friend reach out to me on Facebook about a temporary consulting opportunity. Now, almost 4 weeks out and things are quiet. A conference call about the consulting opportunity was postponed from last night until a time TBD next week.

I am not a homebody, I am not used to being home. But when I do venture out, I want to spend money. I don't have money to spend. Our household depends on my income for paying off Hubby's school debt (he went back to school and got his degree in 2005) as well as parochial school tuition for the 16 YO. Fortunately Hubby's income covers most of everything else.

Anyways, as a Catholic Christian I am so trying to be patient and let the Lord's plan for me unfold in His time. I am terrible at this. I am restless. But I am getting items off my to do checklist accomplished, albeit slowly.

I have reorganized my home office (architectural Dining room). I did buy a new printer and a Sauder TV stand to hold the printer. I have cleaned and organized. (am still working on it. This thing is an elephant. )

Update on my pre-teen son

2011-03-21T03:08:00.000-07:00

It has been over year since I picked up my younger son from the after school program and told him he was not coming back. In a nutshell, A was engaging in inappropriate social behavior (smart-kid obnoxiousness), and his classmates responded with typical social behavior to pressure him to behave more the norm which then caused A to respond inappropriately that the school administration interpreted as potential violence. Fancy way of saying A liked to brag how smart he was, other kids subtly harassed him (Why do I keep avoiding calling it bullying?) and A responded so vigorously that he was the one viewed as the bully.

So we pulled him from the parochial school and put him in the local public school. I am happy to say he is thriving. His grades are A's with the occasional B thrown in. He did get into an altercation on the playground about 2 weeks before Christmas (there is a pattern here) that was quickly resolved by the principal and the school counselor. He also was involved in an incident with a neighbor boy but thanks to a persistent Mom, It did come out that A's story was the accurate one.

But overall, A had a lot of friends. They do seem to shift. He'll play with one kid for a few weeks and then find another. But there are plenty in the neighborhood. He is learning to distance himself from the neighbor who seems to cause him a lot of problems.

I am very happy with my decision.

It’s not enough to keep records, you must review them

2011-03-19T04:01:00.000-07:00

My Dad is a closet car enthusiast. He built his first go cart at the age of 8 from a lawn mower engine. He admires a nice car but ultimately, he’s cheap and has always driven a car that meets his needs at a reasonable cost. As such Dad started keeping a book in each car he owned, and recorded each fuel-up, service and the associated mileage. This is great for evaluating your gas mileage and determining how log it has been since your last brake job. When I bought my first car, my Dad bought an empty receipt journal for my book.

I own a 2002 Ford Escape and I have my book. When I took a new job in 2006 that has my driving 50 miles one way, I used data from the book to analyze if it would be worth my while to buy a different car 9I determined that a payoff would be 4 years, not worth it.) My husband was starting to complain that we seemed to be dumping a lot of money into my beloved SUV. I kept brushing it off, thinking that the repair were less than car payments on a new car.

Now it is 2011. My oldest son will be 16 in April and we are looking forward to him being able to get himself to school and home on his own. That means a car for a teenage boy. After contemplating different scenarios, I decided to purchase a 2010 Prius for me and hand the escape to the teen. But it has been in the shop 3 times in 2011, and it still is not running right. New problems keep cropping up. So we have the car at home and are ready to take it somewhere else to diagnose the current problem (the last shop wanted to just start replace the three catalytic converters).

But here’s the rub. Last weekend I sat down with my book and gathered all of the receipts I found in the glove compartment and my car file. The results were downright sobering. In 2008 we had transmission replaced for about $2200. In 2009 there were various and sundry issue – new spark plugs and coil, new shocks, tires to the tune of at least $2200. (I was missing a few receipts but my book told me what kind of service we had done.) In 2010 a new fuel pump and rack and pinion was $1400. And in less than 3 months in 2011, we have spent $1400. If I had included reviewing my book in my financial housekeeping, I would have known that my beloved Escape was becoming a money pit and I would have traded it in when I purchased my Prius. Now we need to figure out what to do with this barely-running vehicle.

Giving myself more credit

2011-02-25T05:23:00.000-08:00

Gas prices are rising fast with new unrest in the Mideast. Now “they” are saying gas prices as high as $5 a gallon by summer. I sit here and think “Woo-hoo, aren’t I lucky? I bought a hybrid just at the right time.”
But was it really luck? I have been fascinated by hybrids probably since I bought my last vehicle in 2001. The last couple of years, knowing that I would be due to replace my car in 2011 or 2012, I have been thinking/saying “I will see where the alternate fuel cars are when it comes time for my turn to buy a car.”

On line searches for a car for the teen that met my criteria showed I could get an 8-10 year old car with 100,000 miles on it for the money I wanted to pay.
Financing such a used car would be at 7.5%

Hum, maybe time to rethink that plan.

Then the end of the year car ads started coming. Last year’s model year Prius being sold for 0.9% financing. So I started researching hybrids. At the same time news reports were coming every day warning of rising gas prices this year. Further more, my research said that the Prius is rarely on sale, it usually sells at sticker plus a premium. These were selling at invoice + 3%.

It wasn’t luck. I had done my homework. I knew this was a bargain, a rare occurrence that I was in the position to take advantage of.

I’ve gone tree-hugging crunchy.

2011-01-27T08:00:00.000-08:00

I bought a Prius last week. I was not going to buy a new car right away. Hubby and I have successfully implemented a 5 year schedule of replace our oldest car. Hubby’s mini-van was purchased in Feb 2006. So I have one last payment to make on it. My small SUV was purchased Sept 2001. (2 weeks after 9-11). So I really have 8 month to go until it hits the 10 year mark. So why did I cave?

I drive a lot. It’s 20 miles one way to work. In stop and go city traffic. On the interstate.
DS15 will be DS16 in April. Hubby believed that DS should drive to 10 YO SUV and that I should get a new car. I still don’t like the idea of a teen boy and an SUV., so I resisted saying I’d drive the SUV for awhile and get DS15 a small, older stick shift to drive.
I drive a lot. The boys always seem to be going to a practice, game, performance….
I’ve been perusing online lists for used cars. I wanted to spend about $5000. For that money, the cars were all between 8 & 10 years old.
I drive a lot. (80 miles yesterday to work, then running the boys around after work to the Dr, to practice and to the library.)
The SUV get 17 miles per gallon on a good day.
Toyota is running a great deal in December and January on a 2010 Prius.
I drive a lot. My City’s bus system is rather limited and not flexible for me at this point in my life.
Gas prices are going up.
I remembered I drove a full-size van for the first year or so I had my license.

So our car payment went down almost $50 a month. However, we are now insuring 3 cars. I dropped collusion on the SUV and put on the new car and the insurance went up about $50 per month. (until the teen gets his license.)
My fears of feeling like I was sitting on the road after almost 10 years of SUV driving have not come true. It is comfortable enough, and handles well in the snow.
My ultra-conservative (Politically) husband wants to put Republican stickers all over the back on my car lest someone sees him driving it and concludes he’s the least but liberal. But that’s his problem.

Driving Miss Maggie

2010-10-27T11:57:00.000-07:00

The local Morning new show asks a “stumper” question and invited viewers to call or email their answers. Last week they asked “What is it that most people said men are most qualified for?” The answer was teaching their kids to drive.
Not at my house right now. My husband gets nervous at the thought of riding in the car with our son. I am hoping it’s because he’s under a lot of stress right now. He doesn’t do stress well. He’s studying for a certification exam, he’s been traveling for business extensively and mostly he’s taken on a new project management role at work and knows his client is a difficult one.
Not to say that Hubby/Dad hasn’t tried. The day our son got his temps, Dad came home and made the boy jump in the minivan and drive around the neighborhood. He’d only had about 30 minutes on the road and those were in my smaller car. Ok, so he got distracted when he recognized our neighbor as he was making a turn and forgot to turn. That’s why Dad was there, to correct him. But then again, he is very detail-oriented and tried to correct everything at once.
So I have been having the teenager drive whenever I can. Home after we drop the last boy off from carpool after band practice. Then on a Saturday I was able to map out a route on 2 lane roads to the school where his cousins were playing football. He gets better each time.
Then a few Sunday’s Dad tells the teen,” ok in a bit I am going to have you drive me to the store so I can make a return. “ When the teen is out of earshot he tells me “I am nervous as hell about him driving. All I can think of is if he gets into a wreck, how much will this cost us?”
Me: “This is why we have insurance”.
This feels foreign to me, my hubby not wanting to teach our son a coming-of-age skill. It does not seem typical. But then again He also told me he could not believe how our teen just read the book twice and passed his test. He confided that when it was coming up to time for him to be able to learn to drive, he studied his Mom/s actions in the car. He observed how she took turns, when she accelerated in the turn, how she handled this situation and that situation. He mentally practiced. Ah yes, he did complete his engineering degree about 5 years ago. He has the right mind. His Mom says he was such a perfectionist that he mastered riding a bike by going off on his own and practicing without anybody watching until he had it mastered. He did not want anyone watching him try and fail. The older teen is not like this. He is happy go lucky. (The younger boy is more like his dad).

Small successes Driving..

2010-10-14T06:24:00.000-07:00

I have been neglecting my poor blog. I think because I spend more time with Facebook. However, yesterday was a milestone day. I took my firstborn to get his driver's learner's permit or his temps. But as I am scanning blogs, I decided that this was a good time to join in Small successes:

1. I was smart enough to take my son to a local park/forest preserve for his first time behind the wheel. It has roads with speed bumps, stop sins and road lines. We came across the occasional car going the other way. He was able to get a feel for how hard to press on the gas and the brake and how far to turn the steering wheel. He has driven the lawn tractor and his Grandpa's large boats, so being in command of a vehicle with a steering wheel was not new to him.

2. I think I did a really good job of not saying much, biting my tongue and given short, easy to follow instructions. I tried to praise him. Mostly I tried to let him get a feel for how the car operates.

3. I actually feel good about taking him out again. He's not ready for a populated road yet. He still needs to work on figuring out where to stop when coming up to a stop sign. He needs to get a feel as to how close he needs to hug the curb without driving off (did that once or twice).

Update on my teen

2010-08-21T12:08:00.000-07:00

Ok, his friend does not have her driver's license yet. She's not eligible to get her permit until November. Her parents brought the 15 Yo home from the Mixer at the All Girls school.

Oh Boy

2010-08-19T08:39:00.000-07:00

It seems my 15 YO has a Girlfriend. For the last few months I have noticed lots of texting. "Who are you Texting". Answer: "K---". "who?" "K---- M-----" Oh.

Yes we've met her, and her parents. She was a member of the Marching Band last year (nope, not this year).

Aside: DS15 is a Sophomore at an All Boys Catholic High school. Girls from 2 local All girls Catholic High Schools are invited to be members of the Boy's School Band. She's a nice Lutheran Girl attending the all Girls Catholic High school. Yep. Oh, she's a Sophomore, with a driver's license.

A few weeks ago they went to a Church festival together. Hubby says he thinks K was driving and picked up my son.

This morning, on Facebook, I saw a note that my son had indicated that he was attending a Facebook event of a Dance at the all girls school tonight.

Hubby and I sat down with him this weekend and told him, Hey, it's great your are going out and hanging around, but remember school is the priority. I told him that I would prefer he wait for serious stuff for after High School. Hubby told him that girl's mature much more emotionally than boys and that he needs to remember that.

Gosh, I sure hope I've raise a Gentleman. I need to start looking out for that and looking for "teachable" moments. Wish me luck.

August musings

2010-08-09T16:28:00.000-07:00

Wow, August. My High schooler starts back to school a week form tomorrow. He accessed his schedule online today. I think he's happy. Did I tell you they decided he did nto need to take the Study skills class that the kids with IEPs take? He;s able to take a language this year. He decided on LAtin. That was one of the recommendations of the special ed teachers because they don;t have to speak it, unlike Spanish class where it is total immersion. Frech was also a recommendation due to the small class size.

Tomorrow on my lunch hour I will go up to the school and get his laptop. Then his brother can have sole possession of the Netbook I picked up for them.

Summertime

2010-07-19T04:46:00.001-07:00

We are already into the second half of July. It has been a nice easy summer. The 10yo is still upset that he was unable to play baseball this year. He wanted to play Fall baseball but we overrules him and signed him up for football. Since this is the community league, there is at least one teammate in our neighborhood. I already talked to his Mom and she agreed that carpooling to practices would be a good thing.

His coach asked that everyone attend a football camp. We signed him up for a camp that was to be run by his great-uncle (and Godfather) who is a high school football coach, because it would have alleviated daytime transportation concerns, Bit it was cancelled due to low enrollment. A local high school had an evening camp but it was the week we were on vacation. So we found the last camp in town. It is one of those with the name of a pro her in town, twice the cost of any other camp. Sigh. But Grandma is graciously providing transportation.

Maggie

Summertime report

2010-06-29T07:53:00.001-07:00

So far, the summer is going well. My boys are into their third week of the 15 YO being the supervisor of the 10 YO. There have not been too many fights that I have heard of and the hosue is still standing.

They have ventured out on their bikes a few times. The very first week they went ot Mc Donald's for lunch on Monday, Breakfast on Tuesday and then the 15 YO went to Subway on Wed. My neighbor said she got a could of phone calls "Did you know your neighbor boys were venturing out on their bikes?" It's a little worrisome because they are very busy roads. But I have ridden the road with them, there is a bike lane or sidewalks and walk signs. I'd rather they venture out than stay at home all day. They get exercise and develop self confidence and a sense of independence. I just say many prayers that they do safe things and the drivers stay safe around my boys.

U fortunately the Football camp that the 10 YO was going to attend was cancelled due to low enrollment. We missed most of the others and the we willb e on vacation when the evening camp is going on.

Rough waters ahead

2010-04-19T11:43:00.000-07:00

The 10 YO had some friendship/social issues this weekend. It's really hard to figure out what is going on. He claims he got punched for "no reason". The 15 YO claims the he (15yo) made a somwhat rude and sarcastic comment about the 10YO-neighbor#1 but that my 10YO picked up the comments and repeated it several times. So the neighbor decked him. I don't have a huge problem with that since my 10YO can't quite seem to figure out how to get along. (These boys have played well together for almost 3 years). Also, th 10YO friend from about 4 blocks away has not been around seeking a play-date in over a week. This is not a good sign.

Hubby wants to know why our 15YO persists in playing wiht the neighborhood 10YOs. The 15YO is seen as the "cool kid" playing with the younger kids. Maybe that's why he likes it.

-------

Hubby tells me last night that this traveling stuff may become more frequent. (Like it can be more frequent than being gone almost 11 of the past 13 weeks). His company is talking about new responsibilities- good for the career leading smaller but mroe frequent projects. But maybe he'll get to come home every weekend. I keep repeating to myself "Continous employment is a good thing...."

Happy April

2010-04-01T07:02:00.000-07:00

Happy April,

Well, the 10 YO is doing very well in the new school. He's out playing with neighbors. Seems like out year is often full of kids. He got his report card from the new school for the last 6 weeks. He got the highest grade is every subject and his teacher reports that he is adjusting well.

Last week he told me he was trying out for a play. A few days later he told me he got one of the lead roles, the Pirate King. He did tell me that it was all of 4th grade putting on this play, but he had no diea when it would be performed. He really had not other infomration, so I emails his teacher telling her I was trying to get a handle on how big of a deal this was. He reply was that her understanding this was a big deal for Alex and while there woudl be more information coming out after spring break that the performance would be May 20th during they day since cutbacks prevent them from staging performances in the evenings.

Hubby is actually home for 2 weeks. Next week we will take a few days and visit my brother in Chicago. We lucked out this year that the Public schools have spring break the same time as the parochial schools so that both boys are off the same time.

New school, new friends

2010-03-09T13:39:00.000-08:00

The new school means new friends within the subdivision. It is generating phone calls saying " Rember the kid that came with the other kid to the door last night? He lives on the cross street. Can I ride my bike to his house and play?"

And then the follow up call. "Hi Mom, Kid1 could not play so now I am over at kid2's house. I can ride my bike home." Can I play outside at his house while his Mom goes to pick up his bike?"

Crap, is it now convenient for me to give my 10 YO his own phone?

Actually, this is wonderful. The 10 YO is no longer moping around. Yesterday morning he was talking away. At first I was a bit annoyed, but then I remembered that he has not been doing this, so I decided to enjoy it as a sign of the bad times going away.

Superhero quiz - Spiderman?

2010-03-08T06:21:00.000-08:00

Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man		85%
Superman		60%
Hulk		60%
The Flash		50%
Iron Man		50%
Green Lantern		45%
Robin		44%
Batman		40%
Supergirl		27%
Wonder Woman		27%
Catwoman		15%

You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

I was challenged to take this by someone at work.

School update- so far so good

2010-02-23T08:02:00.000-08:00

Today is the 5th day in the new school for my 10YO. He seems happy. He mentions some friends. He's getting his homework finished in class. I will email the teacher to check up on him.

I did see some frustration and anger from him over the weekend. Big brother played his big brother card a couple of times, taking the chair the 10YO wanted and some other slight that really angered the 10YO. I finally looked at him and said "I am sorry that your brother is doing mean things to you and making you angry, but it is time to stop being so mad at the world. I can't change what he did." I do try to keep on top of it and get on the 14YO's case when he does this stuff.

Talking wiht the counselor at his last visit, she said that we need to "get him to stop looking at the world through shit-colored glasses." While crude, it is a good description of the 10 YO's attitude and view point.

I am finding it interesting that he wants to wear athletic pants everyday. "Everybody wears sweatpants" he tells me. Before school uniforms, I did have trouble getting him to wear taylored pants. He is also picky about the feel of his shrits and his socks. He does not like his shirts tight at all. His counselor also said that our capacity for irritation is only so deep. (I picture a well with the bucket on a rope). If some of that capacity is taken up by a scratchy shirt or some other barely noticable irritation, it takes up some of that capacity. I think then we add his daily frustrations of feeling slighted or bosses around by his brother, and he has no fuse left.

Combine this with a sensitive kid who now is starting to imagine slights or insults and we have have an angry boy.

It just keeps coming

2010-02-15T10:00:00.001-08:00

Living in South West Ohio, we get snow. But we are experiencing our third "snow event" in 10 days. And another possibly storm coming our way Friday. Poor kid is doing a good job of keeping the driveay cleared. I am sure he is wishing for a snow blower.

Hardest of Decisions

2010-02-08T17:58:00.000-08:00

I've never been a public school mom, but next week I will be.

Since last post, I did get an email form the Intervention specialist and there is a meeting set for NEXT week to see how to help A. But I talked to A's Counselor and she started asking questions about why it seemed there was such an escalation of his behavior. I told her that other kids seem to be provoking him this week . So she started asking what they were doing about this problem. I sent an email to the principal and her words were "I don't think you need to blow off A's problems by blaming other kids."

Decision made. He'll be in the public school by next week. But now I looked at the calendar and the school is off Monday and Tuesday. Hum. Wednesday then., But it seems as if it has become a toxic environment for him. Not good for a poor 10 year old.

School, behavior, and services, oh my!

2010-02-07T13:16:00.000-08:00

Isn't it amazing how something works well for one kids doesn't work for another?

I am referring to schools here. In Aug of 2007, both boys started at a new Catholic school. My older by was entering 7th grade. The younger (A) was entering 2nd. I worried more about the 7th grader. Guess what,. He did great. The kids embraced him even more than his old school where he had started as a kindergartner. It turns out the the 2nd grader struggled more.

Actually, I have to say that A had some trouble in First grade. He struggled to maintain friendships with his classmates. We kept telling him "You have to be a good friend to have a good friend."

At the new school, in second grade, A decided to try to impress everyone by telling them how smart he is. He'd try to monopolize the attention of any adult that came into the classroom. His teacher brought in the school psychologist who spent some of her time with him during her one day a week in the school role-playing.

The next year, Third grade, there were more of the same issues. We took him to a Counselor on our dime since the school no longer had the services of a school psychologist. We asked the counselor about some sort of social skills class for A. We asked about this because the older boy attended one when he was about First grade and it really helped him. Of course the counselor said a lot of the happen in the school system. (See where I am going here?)

But at the beginning of this year, fourth grade, he made a 180 degree turn. The school noticed a big difference, the counselor noticed a big difference and you could see that A was happier.

Until about 2 weeks ago. The note came home from school asking for a meeting.

We went and met with both of the fourth grade teachers. They said that his behavior had reverted again. He was struggling in group projects and on the playground. One example cited was that in a group exercise, they kept rotating jobs. On the third rotation, A boy was very happy with his job, but there was a girl who did not want to be the scribe so she traded with someone else. A did not this that was right or fair. The teacher did not have a problem with it. However, A just got very angry about it and was seen to be visibly shaking. They keep saying they are afraid that he might hurt himself or another kid. This meeting took place on Monday. We got him an appointment with the counselor on Friday.

Monday afternoon I get a call from the principal. He got into an argument on the playground and was heard to day "If I could, I'd get a gun and shoot you." She asked us to keep him home Tuesday for a cooling off period, and nothing put in him permanent record. Ok. I tried to make it as unfun as I could. Of course he lost the privileges of using any electronics. He cleaned 2 bathrooms, scrubbed a wall, worked with me cleaning the basement, went to the thrift store, etc. In between, he read a book and sang to him self. I guess there was pressure off of him.

So Dad picks him up from aftercare and finds out that before A said what he did, another boy said "I'm going to have my dad throw you off the top of the building." Ok, 10 Year old boys one upping each other. (We have water guns, but no other type in our house).

Friday we get another call. The day before he got into 2 fights. One was in the lunch line where he was arguing with one kids and he turned and picked up the kid behind him and shook him. That mother, understandably, called the principal. Turns out he thought the other kid was poking him in the back. We never did hear if that was true or not. Of course this is unacceptable. A is the biggest kid in the 4th grade. The other boy is one of he smallest.

The struggle I have is that the principal sent him home again saying she does not know what to do. She asked if we had any ideas and asked us to call the counselor for ideas. She says the other kids in the grade are getting afraid of A.

Then Friday afternoon Hubby get a call from the Dad who is his basketball coach. His son upset that A lest school at 9:30 and did not come back without showing any signs of being sick, and was very upset and telling his Dad that is is unfair to A. Coach talked to the Asst Coach who was at school and the intervening adult when the shaking action happened. They are saying that this past week there are three boys who are making it their mission to tease and harass A to get him to blow up. They happen to think it is ridiculous, but I am not going to second guess the school on that.

But why can't the school's intervention specialist help? I sent her an email.

However, this school is a Parochial, Catholic school. It is great for the mainstream, but they don't seem to be willing to work with A. I am ready to change him over to the Public school. That have staff that can help A. It has taken me all weekend to convince Hubby that this is the right thing to do. He's now with me.

Logistics are worrying me. The local school does not start until 8:40. Right now A gets on the bus at & Am and then i drive into work. If I could, I'd start work at 7 AM and leave at 4 PM. I can't see on the website if they have extended day care. I sure hope so.

Now it is a matter of timing. Maybe we can get some assistance from the intervention specialist. Maybe A will once again change his behavior. (Did the fact that he played football this fall make a big difference in his behavior? Ok, so we are trying to rev up his activity level).

Right now, if I get another call this week asking me to take him home before the end of the school day, I am asking for his records so I can enroll him in the public school. Sending him home is not addressing any kind of problem.

Forever-buary

2010-02-02T13:33:00.000-08:00

Hi,

Lots of stuff going on. Wrestling, band, basketball. My 14 yo had a band competion a couple of Saturday's ago.

Drum solos, 8 o'clock on a Saturday morning. The night after Girl's night out. -Mediate on that. Thanksfully I only drank one Margarita.

Me and Santa

2009-12-28T12:36:00.000-08:00

My Grandpa was a "Santa's helper".

Football

2009-12-11T05:21:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's been an exciting year to be a football fan in my City. Our pro-football team is actually doing well, the High School team was exciting to watch between Band performances, my youngest played for the first time. But the University, ah the University. This was the best year in the entire history of the school, a dynamic coach, an undefeated season, a Sugar-bowl game.

Ah, So long Coach Kelly, it's been fun. Right now we are all disappointed. We understood Notre Dame was a dream job of yours. But you kept saying you woudl stay. You said it until the end. Then you let others do the talking. You have disappointed us.

2009-12-02T08:53:00.000-08:00

This cute little guy is a tribute to my boys who are both playing drums in the band. He makes me smile everytime I see him.

O Dark Thirty...

2009-11-25T01:56:00.000-08:00

And I am awake. For the second night in a row I slept badly. I'm not to sre what is going on. I am worried about the 14yo religion grade. I have a small situation at work that has me disturbed. I guess finanials have me worried.

I was keeping my head above water, but 3 car repair bills in October put my credit card over what I can pay off. I had been using my "Emergency Fund" to get through the months. And now Christmas. But Thankfully both hubby and I are both well -employed. We just need to cut back on spending. My biggest frustration is that my idea of utting back is very different from Hubbies idea of cutting back. He lives in a financial fantasy land where there is room for just about everything. He also likes to dream big. I want to hunker down and batten the hatches for a year or so.... But look out come January family!

So I need to get calmed down so I can sleep. I have been hitting the gym. I need to continue this.

Don't tell anyone, but.....

2009-11-10T11:32:00.000-08:00

I fired up the Christmas music on the iPod today. I love Christmas music.

update

2009-10-31T12:28:00.000-07:00

I have been neglecting my blog. But I felt like I would be boring blogging about football games. That seems to have taken up a large portion of my time outside of work. Oh and I am a member of the PArent technology advisory committee for my son's connected high school.

The 10 YO has had a really good start to the school year. We wonder how much his playing football with classmated has contributed to it. Week after next he starts plyaing basketball with more classemates. He is a happier kid then he was 6 months ago.

DS14 finished his first quarter in high school. He did quite well. We followed his grades online through the quarter. He had a few late assignments, but they eventually got turned in. He got an eqaul number of A's and B's. We gave him a hard time because he missed an A average by 0.07 of a point. "If only he had remembered his gym uniform one more day" "or made a layup in gym class", or turned in one of his english assignments on time and got full credit instead of 50%. But we are proud of him.

All Football, all the time

2009-09-15T11:15:00.000-07:00

Ah yes, Football. Third week of the High school and the pee-wee season, second of the College season.

Friday night - High School football. The Opponents were the public high school of where I grew up. (I went to the Parochial school). We won! Here's a pciture of my 14 YO in his full band Uniform

The Saturday we went to the Game at my Alma Mater (and employer). We went becasue it was band day. Various High School band played on the field with the College band. My Hubby went to help with the instruments. the 9 YO and I spent a few hours Tailgating prior to the game with a group of my co-workers. But I made the mistake of going into the book store with my credit card and a 9 YO who thinks everything is cool (much like his Mom). We came out with hats, Rally beads, cups and a foam finger. Sigh. There went my money to buy a new Blackberry. I have to keep using my old one that doesn't always like to answer calls for another month. Our team won buy a huge margin.

Then finally on Sunday the 9yo played. They gave up 4 goals int he first quarter, but none after that. My son also played a new position, defenseive tackle and he was in on 2 tackles. So he was very happy.

My ADD-er in High school

2009-09-04T05:08:00.000-07:00

I can breathe a sigh of relief. He's doing quite well. We attended "meet the teacher" night at the High school this week. All of the teachers talked about how they use the student's laptops in class in addition to their expectations. Can you believe the Math class is all electronic except for tests? For some reason that amazes me. Other classes are more hybrid.

But allg rades are online and accessible for parents. Teachers tend to post them several times weekly. The Math teacher talked about the test they had had that many of the boys did not do well. "I asked hte boys how many of them got a good talking to.." I had not looked. I gues working at a University, I hear way too much about "helicopter parents" and was trying to give him some room. Fortuantely, it turns out my son did well, getting an 85 on that test.

When I did look at his ggrades, it looks like there were a couple of quizzes he was not quite prepared for, but since that first week, It looks like he got the message and has been keeping up on his homework.

His biggest hurdle seems to be remmebering when he has gym and making sure he has his gym uniform. I think I am going to go and get him a pair of athletic shoes to keep at school. The Uniform code will soon change from summer dress to a more business casual where they cannot wear athletic shoes. Because of their block schedule, he had gym every 4th day, so it is not the same day each week. Even the Phys Ed teacher said he struggles with this after 7 years.

I guess we'll just need to keep an eye on his scores and help him if he starts to fall, lend him a hand. But we are starting off great.

My son and his Drum

2009-09-01T03:36:00.000-07:00

He really enjoyed this night.

ADHD File system

2009-08-29T03:44:00.000-07:00

So I am sitting here at 6 Am on a Saturday morning going through paperwork. Handling paper tends to be difficult ofr ADHD-ers. IN my Household, 2 of us have been diagnosed and treated for ADHD. Most people think I "Outgrew" it, but I say I just learned good coping techniques.

So when paper comes in, I have a "bill basket" it is actually a box that some bath gel came in. I found this time that I left this a bit longer than usual and the box was full and I had another basekt (Longaberger Spring) that was about half full. So I sat down, opened the envelopes and immediaely started 2 piles, trash and shred. I also have a simple box folder filled with several file folders. They are labeled: Tax, Medical/Dental, Assets, School Insurance and "credit crap". Every few months I sit down and go through all of my statements. I shred what needs to be shredded, throw away the trash (envelopes, other pamphlets without personal information). I also find I have put reciepts for thing like Prescritions that I used the flexible benefits debit card for. This way if I need to go back and find something, I can go throguh one file folder thinking "I know I saw that somewhere."

My file cabinet is more divided, but I tend to file stuff away in it once a year, usually when I run through taxes. The two step file method works well with my personality. Just remeber to keep it simple.

Meal Planning

2009-07-30T06:13:00.000-07:00

I have been saying lately that I am in the "Mom's taxi" phase of life. My boys are 14 and 9 and both are rather self-sufficient except for getting themselves places. (Although I have taken them on bikes to show them how to get the library and a close by shopping center safely. And DS14 has gotten the bike out a few times this summer and trerated himself to McDonald's. )

At the beginning of May I knew it was going to be a hectic month with baseball games and practices. We had just recently purchased a membership at Costco and if there was not a plan in place for meals, Hubby would default to eating out eventhough he is trying to plus that hole in his wallet. Thus I made a monthly menu. I did write down somethign for each day, but at least the days when I knew we woudl be rushed. I also did a first of the month shopping trip to Costco (I get paid once a month, so that was the easiest) and divided up super-huge parcels of meats into meal-sized or individual sized servings (such as hamburger patties).

My family liked having that spreadsheet ont he fridge so much. My 9 YO has a habit of asking first thing in the morning or when he gets pciked up "What's for dinner? If the meal planned was an oven thing, I could have it prepared in the fridge and have the 14 Yo put it int he oven so it was ready when I walked in the door.

So here it is, the end of July. I am ready to start this process for August, I have the 14yo's band schedule (I think) but I only have information on the 9 YO's first Football practice.

I am worried. the 9 YO will be at after school care. Most liely we will not have time to take him home before football practice. He will have to be fed soemthing before practice. He's not much of a sandwich eat, so that will most likely mean fast food (Yuck! and expensive).

So here is what I am thinking:
1.) load some gift cards for Wendy's for once a week. I think football for the 3rd and 4th graders will be 2 nights a week.
2.) Make him eat a sandwich the other night.
3.) I will be picking the 14 yo up at school after practice. So we will need something quick.

I know a lot of busy people use their crock pots. I find that many of the crockpot meals I have tried do not hold up well after 10 hours. I just do not find them appetizing.

Anyways, I'll update on my progress.

Weekend trip -

2009-07-20T09:15:00.000-07:00

I borrowed this image from Wikipedia. It is Pilot Mountain in North Carolina. We pass by it on the way from home to my Mom and Dad's. This is the pciture form I-77 in VA - about mile marker 5. I was so tempted to take my own picture. But seeing this means we it is just over 2 hours left. About 30 minutes after you first see this site, we drive right by it on US52.

Approaching Pilot Mtn from the South.

Anyways, I drove from SW Ohio to Central NC on Friday. It's camp G&G Month. (G&G is Grandma and Grandpa.) My Niece and Nephew stayed for a week. Then on the 11th we all drove halfway and I met my Dad at Tamerack in Beckley WV where I traded my Niece and Nephew form my 14 YO. Then this past weekend I went all the way down with the 9 YO and Sunday brought back the 14 YO.

On Saturday, the 14 YO water skiied and both he and the 9 YO tubed. My Dad managed to toss them both off the tube. LOL!

We made good time on the way home. There is only one little part of US 35 in WV that is not 4 lane divided. Those tend to be the longest 10 miles. The 14 YO and I arrived home about 8.5 hours after we left. We got McD's to go for breakfast, a Bio-break, a gas and Bio stop, 2 more Bio-breaks and then the grocery store.

Summertime quickies

2009-07-08T06:09:00.000-07:00

We are still on target making some changed to the family money management. That is good. But I still get down at times.
My teenager has broken 100 lbs. That is good for a child on stimulant meds. His growth has been steady. I am waiting for a large growth spurt. My Hubby grow 5 inches when he was a freshman in High school. And little brother is only about 4 inches shorter, but as broad in the shoulders.
We are on sumer hiatus from organized activities. July 27 the teenagers has pre-band camp band practice. Aug 3rd the 9YO begins football practice.

Anger

2009-06-23T12:13:00.000-07:00

I’m angry today. But here’s the thing, I’ve already been through the anger with this particular situation. The party at fault understands my anger and has apologized. And I moved on.
But the past couple of days that anger has surfaced again. This situation does not have a practical quick fix. It’s one of those where slow and steady wins the race. So I am trying to suppress this anger. But this suppression is eating me up inside.

So why did the anger come welling back up? I think because I heard a round of “woe is me” and I feel that this was misdirected. Then a partial remedy was discussed and there was enthusiasm, but there were excuses about why there was difficulty in following up with the remedy. I take 5 minutes online and find the information needed and it was online. Thus it did not require a phone call nor a 45 mile drive. And the responsible party surely had time to do this search with the fact that the computer is always on whether a game is being played or an online show is being watched.

Anyways, maybe this confession will help me move on.

My High school Freshman

2009-06-05T10:08:00.000-07:00

And man, The Pomp and Circumstance that the Catholic Church does so well made is a wonderful 8th Grade graduation ceremony.

Baseball game

2009-05-12T06:28:00.000-07:00

We were fortunate enough to have been given tickets to the Red's game for Mother's Day. My Aunt and Uncle had these tickets but two of their children graduated from College. Above is my Mother-in-law, my husband and my two boys.

The boys practicing their vertical leap. And a good time was had by all.

Decisions, decision - at 1:00 in the morning

2009-05-06T11:35:00.001-07:00

I have the on call pager this week. Last night one of the email perimeter servers stopped working. I could not access it remotely, it needed to be restarted by having someone takeout the power cord, counting 5 “steamboats and plugging it back in. Last weekend our data center went “lights out” during the overnight hours. So my fuzzy brain is trying to process it all. Now this server is one of four. It could stay down until morning. However, I did not know how to disable the monitoring service so that the pager would not go off every hour. I decided to go in and take care of it then I would drive back home (this is a 20-mile trip) to get my boys up and ensure they made it on the school bus. Oh yes, Hubby is on a business trip this week.

So when I arrived back at work this morning, my senior tech asked why I came in. I told him I thought about it, and decided that I wanted to set a good example for the rest of the team. As I thought about it, I may have made a different decision if Hubby had been at home and available to get the boys on the bus. I would have gone in about 5 AM, got the server back up and running and then gone on with my day.

Yes I now know how to suspend the monitoring for a particular server. We are also going to sit down at our team meeting on Friday and make a list of the critical servers that we should make the trip in to the data center in the wee hours of the morning to fix.

Mother's day giveaway at 5 minutes for Mom

2009-05-05T05:51:00.000-07:00

The first blog that shows up in my feed reader is 5 Minutes for Mom. For mother's day this year, they are giving away a Toshiba laptop. Check it out and sign up to win it.

That's 5 minutes for Mom. The soft pink is really pretty.

We could use a new machine at home. We have 2, but there are both from about 2002. My boys use them to surf the Internet. They are great for that. One of these days I should get adventurous and put Linux on one. But I just picked up this slide scanner. I have slides my Grandparents took in the 60's and early 70's. There is actually an obscene number of me as a baby. I was the second grand child, my Mom is #2 of 11 kids. Anyways, this slide scanner only works with USB2. Both my home computers have USB1.

Did I mention that both Hubby and I have laptops from work. We are often both sitting int he family room with the TV on and our computers going. Hubby likes to play games and I like to read blogs and forums. LOL!

2009-04-23T06:45:00.000-07:00

Can you believe it? I am up-to-the minute on my scrapbooking. All current event (except for the 9 YO soccer, are printed and in the binder. Of course I am a simple scrapbooking. I'm not much into too many embellishements. Put some pictures on a page, make the background a matching or coordinating color, add some descriptions and I am happy.

We spent our spring break at My Mom and Dad's lakehouse in NC. I went through Mom's pictures again and scanned in a lot of old family pictures. I posted most of them on my facebook page. One in particular was a family picutre from 1986. I have about 10 cousins who are in their 20's looking at the picture with new eyes and commenting on it. That's what I enjoy abotu Facebook. We get to connect with each other.

My next effort is to start going through slides. My Aunt did some cleaning a few years ago and wanted to get rid of the slides. My grandfather took many slides. Last night I mostly went through a 6 quart platic box of them. There are mostly from 1962, 1966-1975. This is going to be fun.

My son, the "adult"

2009-04-03T18:12:00.000-07:00

Or at least in the Catholic Church. He was confirmed March 31. I can't believe I turend down my Mother-in-law's offer to take a picture of he and I. (Dad had to go out of town).

Get out the shovels

2009-03-08T16:43:00.000-07:00

It's time to clean out the 13 YO's room again. I have learned to expect to see weird things. This is what struck me as being the oddest:

It is a 2 litre of soda stuffed in a gym bag that I found in his closet. He had taken the soda to school for a science experiment. I guess he never used it and brought it back home. But in his closet???

The IEP meeting: Transition to High School

2009-03-05T11:49:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago we had the yearly IEP meeting. This one was a big one, Three teachers, the speech teacher who assists as a resource teacher, The principal, the student (my 13YO) my husband, me, the Intervention specialist, the Intervention specialist from the High School.

I have to say it went well. I was reassured by the IS from the High School. I think it was great to have the 13Yo there also. The IS told him "Here are your responsibilities:" and he signed the form. We have a better idea of what to expect. Out of 225 boys in each class, there are 12-17 that are part of the "IEP Class". I heard that one of my son's wreatlign teammates is ont he waiting list to be a part of the IEP class as part of his admission.

Each boys gets a laptop. All teachers post homework assignments on the web. He will e responsible for entering the assignments to his local calendar. One of the problems he has is not writing down his assignments. Last week a project for Religion class was sent back home to be re-done. The 13 YO did not know what the requirments were for. That made me decide that if I had to repeat the year, I would specify in his IEP that "any assignments longer than 1 day should be written down." We search high and low for the requirments of the project. I even hacked his facebook account and posted a question to his classmates while he was at wrestling practice. We finally convinced him to call someone and ask about it.

My ADHD teen and sports

2009-02-19T06:27:00.000-08:00

We are coming to a rather scary period of time. It is the between sports season time. Wrestling season is coming to a close. Baseball won't start until the first of April. Actually, Spring has not been as much of a problem as late Fall, I think becasue we have been able to keep the 13YO is some extended wrestling. Even practice 2 days a week prevents many Hyperactivity symptooms. However, he is showing signs of being ready to be done with Wrestling. Last Spring Hubby had the boy going to the off season practices, but he was goofing off even more and that's not fair to the coaches or the other teammates. So I am hesitant to do this again. Maybe they will keep up on the strength training on Tuesday night. I think we can convince him to go to those.

Another note, we met with the Intervention Specialist for Freshmen of the High school yesterday. That makes me feel even better that this school is the right decision, not matter what other uses I can come up with for spending that tuition money.

More High School musings

2009-02-11T10:13:00.000-08:00

Due to some bad decisions and financial mind games that were played this summer, our finances are crap. To someone’s credit, the problems have been realized and the future course has been adjusted.

Fortunately we are both still well-employed and our jobs look as stable as they can be at this time. We have cut back on expenditures greatly. Although I still feel like I am often saying “No, let’s not eat out. Let eat at home I can whip up ______. “

Anyways, I have written here about the parochial high school. That decision seems to have been made and then it comes back up as a debatable item. I think my once a week carpool friend is tired of hearing me go on about it. LOL! But it is debatable. We are fortunate enough to live in one of the best public school districts in the state. There is also another parochial High school only a mile further away from our house where the tuition is significantly best.

But the chosen school, while big, features a house system where the boys are broken up into groups of about 160. There are daily mentor group meetings of about 20-25 boys with the same teacher year after year. My ADHD son still needs some guidance and someone to be accountable too.

But if I listen closely, I am bombarded with the message that this is the right choice. Three teachers at last night’s open house commented that they think my son will do well at the chosen school next year. Next week we have a meeting to revise his IEP for next year. The intervention specialist from the high school will be there.

Sending him to this high school is like sending him to an Ivy League college. The Alumni are a tight-knit, involved and loyal group. Many events associated with the school that we have been to have been run by dedicated staff, faculty and parents of current students. It’s the network.
So why can’t I make peace with this? How does an excellent education compare to being debt-free? (Or having less debt?) Are we still living a life built of cards? Who knows what this economy will bring.

Oh yes, as a reminder, College tuition will be covered for him. As a benefit of my job, my dependants can take advantage of tuition remission at the state university where I work. If it weren’t for this benefit, the High school would be out of the question.

P.S. At lunch today, I was once again talking about the High school decision. One of the guys with us said that his experience that the kids coming out of our public High School are good at Math but here at the College they often have to take remedial English. Yes God, I am listening. Thank you for the reinforcement.

More snow...

2009-02-03T17:08:00.000-08:00

Even as of this morning, the forecasters were predicting show showers with very little accumulation. But at about 2:45, some turned the faucets on. The city is project to get 4-8 inches of the stuff. At my house we have about 4 so far.

Somewhere around 2012 I expect to see then again

2009-01-31T08:20:00.000-08:00

My snow boots that is. Living in SW Ohio, so years we get appreciable snow and some years we don't. Last week we received close to 1o inches (some packed down by rain) and my boys were out of school for 4 days.

But the upshot is that I don't buy them boots every single year. I wait until they seem necessary and we confirm that we don't have any old boots in the house that will do the trick. This year, the 9YO had outgrown the boots I got him last year. the 13yo was still squeezing into the one I got him. But a couple of poss ago i mentioned getting new show for the 9 yo. Now they are getting very close to the size of my feet. So, of course when it was time for the boys to go shovel the driveway. the 9YO complains about his lack of boots. So I told him to put on the 13yo boots and the 13 Yo to put on mine. Fortunately mine are a nice gender-neutral navy blue. Maybe the toes are a bit pointed, but it does not bother him. I thin he are a little big. They are a ladies 11 and his shoes are a men's 8. But I figure that between he two of hem they will be able to wear my boots for the next three years if not more.

Actually, I think I will try to get myself a pair of men's boots. My cute LL bean boots are just not quite wide enough to accommodate my lovely ankle brace. Time to look for winter clearance sales.

Also, they are predicting another storm Monday night.

Ice, Ice Baby

2009-01-28T04:19:00.000-08:00

My kids are on their second snow day. Even the University I work for opened at 10 AM. They then closed as of 5:00 PM. Yesterday is was snow, then we got rain all night (ground temp was about 22 degrees). Looking outside this morning, you can see the house light reflecting off the ice outside. Now the snow is starting. It's not even light and my 9 Yo has 2 pairs of sweat pants on ready to go play outside.

I should have some pictures. Later today.

Too Big

2009-01-21T11:02:00.000-08:00

Late last week my 9 YO shows me where his shoes are coming apart on the inside. Sigh.
We had to go to the Men's department to find shoes to fit him. We started at Kohls. They did not have any 7-1/2. He did try on a few pairs of size 8 but he did not find a pair he really liked.

So we went to Famous footwear. The first pair he liked and found in a 7-1/2 were $69.99 on sale. He's 9. I am not paying Seventy bucks for a pair of shoes he'll either outgrow or wear out in three months. Fortunately we found a pair of Adidas on sales for $30.

He's got the feet of my family. My Dad wears a 12 and my brothers both wear a 13. My husband only wears an 11.

Where is my little boy going?

Oh boy, forgot the patch

2009-01-18T16:35:00.000-08:00

The ADHD 13 YO had a wrestlign tournament in Cleveland today. Last night hubby called me saying he forgot to pack the boys medication. Oh boy. Even the boys psychiatrist admitted after getting his medical records that it appears as if he needs some sort of meds. He's been on high doses ever since he started. He's also had a steady growth rate. She was initially worried about his 25 percetile in weight and height for his age.

Hubby ended up going to the store and buying a couple of can of Red Bull. He did have a talk with one of the coaches who noticed that the boy "was a different kid" In one match against a former teammate, he made stupid moves and did not listen to his coach.

Last week I blocked internet access for him between 3:30 and 5:00 PM. He was not too happy, but once again he spent too much time on the internet and not doing his homework. He did admit to having some outstanding assignments. I threw a verbal fit when I found out that he had three lab write ups to do over the weekend but only told us he had one.

This Friday is the day we have to go and pay the tuition deposit for his High School. We did tell him that we were not paying the tuition for him to have missing assignments. Dad told him we are committed to his freshman year, but he needs to prove it is worth our money. Otherwise he could attend our excellent public school and we could take a vacation.

He has been accepted.

2009-01-14T05:57:00.000-08:00

Back in November I wrote about the Parochial High School selection process here in our Archdiocese. We have gotten mailings from all 10 of the High Schools that accept males. One school in particular sent us a lot of materials.

The results of the Catholic High School Entrace exam arrived Saturday, along with a letter stating that DS13 had been accepted at the school of his choice. Of course Mom and Dad have to show up in person on Jan 23rd to submit the application form and the tuition deposit.

Here's the proud boy mdleing his T-shirt they sent ofr him to wear to 8th grade day at the school:

Santa Claus

2008-12-31T06:51:00.000-08:00

So my worldly 9 year seemed bound and determined to prove that Santa Clause was not the person who put additional gifts under the tree. He talked about setting up the video camera to survey the tree. He discussed his plans at length with Uncle Bill, Aunt Email, Grandma and Grandpa and whoever else was around Tuesday evening.

Well, this year I did not reserve any of the gifts to wrap in the separate “Santa Claus Paper”. All gifts were wrapped in the each person’s designated paper and on Christmas Eve I moved the pile from my bedroom to under the tree.

The we went to 5 PM Mass at my Brother and SIL’s Church, went back to their house for dinner and gifts. We arrived home about 10:30 where Mr. Morning person (just like his Mom) declared he was going to bed.

Christmas morning he was the first one downstairs (I was in the shower when he got up). He tells me “there are no more gifts there.”

“Nope, there are not. But why don’t you go get your gifts and put them under the tree.”
And he did. “Hey, look at that, You are Santa Claus."

“No I am not”

“Sure you are, anyone who gives gifts at Christmas is Santa Claus. We all give gifts to in Memory of St. Nicholas, a generous man who left gifts.”

Now I’m not sure he bought all this. But I sure hope it sinks in. I want him to think of Santa Claus as the embodiment of giving. My Parents used to tell me “Santa is the Spirit of Christmas.

The picture is of him sitting on Santa’s lap Christmas night.

Included in my Chrsitmas card to Out-of Town-ers

2008-12-23T06:45:00.001-08:00

scrapbook pages - digital

2008-12-23T06:28:00.000-08:00

I swear they have cameras in my house...

2008-12-22T04:43:00.000-08:00

Tidbits

2008-12-16T04:52:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my 9YO Drama King lamented how mis-treated he has been throughout his life ?! - Serious discussions ensued. He did concede that he was lucky that he had a friend next door, both parents married and living together, plenty of food to eat, clothes to wear, Cable TV to watch, video games and internet.
The 13YO is going to have a rude surprise when he comes home and finds that he cannot get ont he computer. I password protected it. He's been finding other things to do rather than his homework.
Both boys have Christmas programs (it is a Parochial school, so it is a Christmas program) LOL). The 9 YO had the school where every kids from K-5th participate. The 13 YO has a band concert. I told Hubby we'd flip a coin, but he decided to let the 9 YO choose who he wanted to go to his program. He Chose Dad. Yeesssss! I get to go to the Advanced band concert.

Nightmare Morning

2008-12-12T05:14:00.000-08:00

Tuesday morning was the morning I live in fear of. The 13 Yo got up late, argued with his 9 YO brother and did not pay attention to the clock. He went abotu his morning preparations leisurely. He was not concerned that he did not have all of his stuff together. Even when we went outside to wait for the bus, he had to go back inside and find something. The bus came around the corner he flies out of the house and down the driveway forgetting stuff sitting int he garager for him to take.

My take on things is that he should come downstairs int he moring, dressed, pack his backpack, put on his shoes, gather his stuff by the door and then make his breakfast. I keep portable foods and he can take his breakfast with him. The bus drive may not be too happy, but he would have time to eat between the time he arrives ont he school grounds and when class starts. But his focus is on getting food into his belly.

I hate the yelling that goes on in my house. I want him to do things one way and he wants to do them another. I guess that's like with a teenager. Now if only he were an organized teenage.

16 years together

2008-12-05T04:50:00.001-08:00

Three Cheers for carpools

2008-12-04T09:46:00.000-08:00

So the 13Yo ended up deciding to stick with wrestling this winter. He talked about giving it up. We told him he could if he came up with a differet activity to fill the void. I don't think he took much effort into looking at indoor soccer and came back to wrestling by default.

He has been wreatling since first grade. So this is his 8th year. Moving last year had us at a new program that was much more intense than the old program. He has 3 other boys close to his weight class. He just does not have the killer instinct and last year, when the referee blew the whistle, he got a "deer-in-the-headlights look on his face. He will bein his first tournament of the season on Saturday. It is an alternate tournament - the B team if you will.

My big thing is that with the move, we are in a bigger city. At the old house, the High school where he practiced was 4 miles from the house. It was an easy 10 minutes if you were stopped by all the traffic lights. In the new city, the Parochial high school is 13 miles away. At 3 night a week of practice, that a lot of driving. Very much like the football season we jsut finished up. So when the roster was sent out, I sent an email to a parent who lives not to far asking about a carpool. It took a few days but she got back to me and said we were welcome to join the carpool that 4 boys were already are part of. We will only have to drive once every other week. This really helps keep me sane on nights like last night where Hubby is out of town and the 9YO had to be at practice at 6:00 several miles from the 13Yo practice location.

With this carpool, we all meet up at the house closest to the freeway. The boys call or text when they leave the school after practice and we pick them back up at the same house. This is much less driving and gives me about 3 hours between drop off and pick up. That means I can eat at home and not be finding a Kroger that has the fancy new sushi counter and getting a Californial roll for my dinner.

A Day without the ADHD Meds

2008-11-29T04:32:00.000-08:00

I promised my 13YO's new psychiatrist that we'd try a medication vacation. She's the first Doctor who has though this was necessary. I got the impression that she was worried about his small size and weight. (The 9 YO wears the same sized shirts. His leg are not as long).

I was expecting (and dreading) him
to be mouthy and obnoxious. But this was not the case. I believe that they boy tried really hard to contain himself. He was definitely restless. At one point I made him drop to the floor and do 10 push-ups. 9I also did 10). About 20 minues later, we both did some situps.

We had to remind him multiple times to eat breakfast, get dressed, brush his teeth and put in his contacts. Actually, as a new contact lense wearer who has had difficulty getting his lenses in, He seemed to not have trouble.

More than once he'd be in the bathroom just singing or chanting "peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly." We went to the tree farm and cut down our Christmas tree. He was loud and dacing around, but pleasant. Dad would not let him carry to bow saw, but the boys carried the tree back. At one point I was worried we'd have to haul them both and the tree out of the pond. They wanted to trow sticks and try to break the partial sheet of ice.

After the farm we went to the little town and had lunch. Walking on the sidewalk, he wanted to stomp. This drove his dad nuts. On the way back he stomped a bit and then I told him "take Baby steps now", then "skip".

In the evening we had company. My brother, SIL and their 4 kids came over for dinner. His twin cousins are his age and he usually enjoys spending time with them. But he withdrew. I think he felt like he needed to stay away from everybody. While it was a shame he missed out on visiting his cousins, he was quite aware of his state of mind. This seems like the first time he has been aware of him own actions and state of mind.

In the evening he did complain about his stomach hurting. He did graze all day. We stopped for lunch and he only ate half of his sandwhich. As I expected, he ate the rest about 2 hours later. While preparing for dinner, he scraped a carrot and ate it (while repeating "What's up doc?" about 5 times.

Dad could nto tolerate the extra noise he generated. Dad thinks he can control himself more. I am happy that he was quite aware of his state of mind and his actions. I'd not really like ot repeat the experiment again. If the psychiatrist wants to do it just to assist him in piling on the caliries, I sure hope she gets his records from other doctors and sees that he has been growing and putting in weight in an upward curve.

Cleaning my 13 YO ADHD-ers room

2008-11-25T07:02:00.001-08:00

Boy, I should have had my camera. I have been trying to be specific with him. My instructions are:

Clothes in the dirty clothes hamper or put away in a drawer or the closet.
Trash in the trash can
Books on the bookcase

The clothes issue wasn't too bad. Go figure, he used to leave a pile of clothing on the right side of his dresser, on the open floor between his dresser and his bookcase. The hamper sat on the left side of the dresser. So it took a year of living here for me to get the bright idea to tell him to put his hamper on the other side of his dresser and instead of tossing the clothes on the floor, toss them in the hamper. It's not perfect, but it does work better.

Book were all over his night stand and under his bed. I moved a bunch of books (kids series such as Jedi Apprentice and Secrets of Droon) into the 9 yo's bedroom since the 13 yo reguarly denies addmittance to his brother to look for a good book to read. I have bought duplicate books int eh past. While I was cleaning under the bed, I found the 9 YO's missing library book. The 9YO asked for permission to look for it in his borhter's room, the 13 Yo denied permission and I believed there would be no reasont he book was up there. Sigh! Won't happen again.

The boy left trash everywhere. Tissues, papers and the candy wrappers. He is not supposed to have food in his room. Under the bed and in particulary, inside the drawer of his nightstand. Ick! I can tolerate a lot of his mess. Not the food wrappers. Then he had left several pieces of chewed gun inside a pencil holder sitting on his dresser. The holder went in the trash.

And oh, the pens and pencils (and marker, highlighters, and even a box of crayons.) He has always been a "collector" of orphaned pens and pencils 9at leat I am tellingmyself they were orphaned). He does not typically do his homework in his room. There is a table in the unused and sparsely furnished living room where he dumps his stuff and sometimes does his homework if he's been banned from the computer desk. So I collected all the writing instrucments and put them in a tim labled "writing instruments" on our bookcase.

I ended up filling up a tall kitchen garbage bag of "stuff" from his room. This incleuded the above wrappers and pencil holder. Also finding their way there were paperclips, rubberbands and some small fast food restaurant toys. I saved some hot wheel cars and dice and removed them from the room. I must have put about 5 small rubber bouncy balls in that bag.

Next up is his closet. I need to recover from the rest of the room before I tackle that closet.

New ADHD Doctor

2008-11-12T09:43:00.000-08:00

Yes, we had to find another Mental health provider.

Maybe I'd better state that this is for my 13 YO son. He was diagnosed as ADHD at the tender age of 4. It was not a big surprise, but I did ask the Psychologist if she was sure and what were the specific behaviors that led her to the conclusion. (I was on Ritalin as a child and I have a brother who struggles with ADHD).

We say Dr. B for this condition for 7 or 8 years until Dr. B decided to teach full time and not do see private practice patients. Then we went to Dr. H. Old wonderful Dr. H is a pediatric neurologist who treated both me and my brother. I was amazed he was still in practice. Then after about o year and a half of taking my son to the doctor my Mom described as "The most woderful man int he world" in my baby book, we moved.

So we got a recommendation to the Mental Health facility associated with the new city's Children's hospital. We visited wiht the Nurse Practioner twice, but my insurance would not cover visits to her. Since the Children's Hospital Metal Health department was so busy and my son is 13, they sent us to a new Mental Health center on the North side of town near where we live.

Dr. F is young and enthusiastic. She is going over everything with a fine tooth comb. This is good and I know it's good, but I do find myself wanting to sigh heavily at some of her suggestions and concerns and tell her "we've tried that." LOL!

She is concerned because he's in the 25th percentile of weight for his age. She wants me to switch to Whole Milk and give him high calorie foods. Let me tell you, there is not a lack of high calorie foods in my house. I keep cheese, pepperoni bites and other quick snacks just for him. He's always been in the 25th percentile and his progress is good. (He was wrestling at 86 lbs last year and this year he's weighing in at 92 lbs.)

Becasue of his size, she'd like us to try giving his a medication "vacation". This scares me. Then child is quite impulsive. He also gets a mean and nasty mouth on him. But mostly he has a tendancy to wind himself up so high during the day, that he had no idea how to bring himself down in the evening. We are going to try it the Friday after Thanksgiving. I certainly will no thave him do it on a day when he's home alone. But who knows, maybe it will not be the trying day I imagine it to be.

High School choices.

2008-11-07T05:09:00.000-08:00

We had the intention, even before we had children to give the a parochial school education. DS13 is in 8th grade. The Archdiocese we live in recentally did away with the feeder school system for high school becasue of the proliferation of private vs parochial schools, the intenness of Athletics and the accusations of some schools being able to recruit and others not. There are 16 Parochial and Private High Schools in the "Greater Metropolitan area." Ok, 6 are Women only, so that leaves 10. We have narrowed it down to 2 that our public school district will bus too, a co-de and one all Male.

There are only 3 good reasons to go to the one school,

It's a lot cheaper
My moderately athletic son could make the teams - especially Wrestling
Girls go there.

When we move in July 07, to choose what area we moved to, I first tried to think "where do I want the boys to go to High School and I chose "M". So once we did move, we signed the 13 Yo up to wreatling with the club at "M". So we did a good sales job. It's a really great school. They have a house system (yes, like Harry Potter) to keep the boys from getting lost. They are in their 10th year of supplying laptops to all students and 50% of the texts are electronic. (Hello $3000 difference in yearly tuition). There is a real family feel. He's excited to go there. Right now the plans are for him to be a member of the marching band in the fall, wrestle in the Winter and try out for the baseball team in the spring.

But this has been an interesting journey. Since the poor kid probably won't do much College searching - one of my benefits is Tuition Remission at the University I work for, he gets to do it now.

My DVR...

2008-10-27T09:32:00.000-07:00

Goodbye old friend, you have been a part of our lives for about 2 ½ years. But it is time for you to go. Its not you, it is us. We need to stand on our own feet.

You have been loyal, recording all the show we ask of you, very often two at a time. You have saved those shows for us to watch at other times. However, getting rid of you will save at least $25 per month and that’s not including the extra we pay for the digital tier.
Why do we need to free up the money? Well, the public story is that next year our oldest son wants to attend a parochial high school. The tuition is triple what we are currently paying for the Primary school tuition.

It took some effort on my part to convince the Mister. He loves to record shows. But he discovered that he can stream them online. He made the decision to cut it out about a week ago. He needed to watch all the shows that had already been recorded. But yesterday he spent time watching a new show on the CBS website. He declared “I don’t need the DVR.”

The 9 YO was taking it hard last night. He wanted to know how he could watch Star Wars Clone wars and total Drama Island. Apparently Nick and Cartoon network don’t have streaming episode. These shows are on after his bedtime.

So Long dear DVR, we will miss you.

Update: I just went to CartoonNetwork.com. They have 2 versions of full episodes online. Now do I show the 9 YO?

Contact lenses

2008-10-26T14:09:00.000-07:00

I got the 13 YO Contact lenses. We picked them up on Thursday. He put them in after school on Friday, He wore them for 6 hours on Sat and is planning on 8-9 today.

We left him at the Church Spaghetti Dinner. He is volunteering. We ate our dinner befreo his shift started. Several of his classmates were there and commented. We came across a girl who we have seen at Football games. She always calls out to him. She came by and told him he looked cool.

Thinking about Christmas

2008-10-16T07:42:00.000-07:00

I've bought some things: I've finished my brother. I've gotten a pair of gloves for one of the boys.

I am now thinking about my niece. Last night I was wondering around Hobby Lobby, thinking of giving her a frame with a picture of her and I and my Mom taken at the beach this summer. Then I came across some frames that looked like a scrapbook page. Even better, I can create a scrapbook page with the picture and then put the page in a frame. I like the idea of an 8x8 page.

Speaking of scrapbooking, I have only scrapped up until mid-2004. The rest of the pcitures are sitting on digital media somewhere. I must have 4 CDs saying they have pictures form 2003, 2004 & 2005. I guess I did not take many pcutures druing that time frame.
I also discovered that I did an 81/2x11 book on my older son. I need to check where it ends. I suspect it's about 2003.

I can't decide if I want to do some digital pages or not. I was able to get a copy of Photoshop Elements for a discounted price through work. I tried yesterday to create a new blog banner but was unable to complete it. I need to try again.

Monday Randomness

2008-10-13T10:20:00.000-07:00

Last Monday was my birthday. I got a pretty purple iPod from Hubby.

Our Weather is still pretty summer-like. They are talking frost toward the end of the week though.

It looks like the busy-ness of the 13 YO is helping him do a good job of keeping on top of his homework. Like his Dad, he is a procrastinator. Football does not leave him much time to procrastinate. Hopefully Wrestling will do the same.

Speaking of the 13 YO, 7th and 8th graders were invited to play with the High School band Friday night. He got to ride the bus to the stadium. I did not stay up to see him when he got home. But the next morning he said he had a great time, he broke his drum sticks and got a stick shoved up his nose. (Boys!) He told Dad he thinks Marching Band might just be his Fall sport. Cool!

My 9 YO thinks he's invincable. He is getting tired of going to his brother's football practices and games. He keeps asking if he can stay home. Friday afternoon he wanted to stay at home while Dad picked up the 13 yo from his after school study session (Studying for the Catholic High School entrace exam). Dad had to drop the 13 yo off at the High School for the big game. The problem was I was riding the bus home from work. If something came up, the 9 Yo was on his own. A few weeks ago he stayed at home by himself while Dad went to pick up big brother practice. The run was that I was 10 minutes up the street at dinner with some friends.

Why?

2008-10-02T09:37:00.000-07:00

Do smoke and carbon Monoxide detectors always give their low battery alerts in the dead of the night?

It took us 10-15 minutes to find the detector that was beeping last night. It would beep and then it emitted a voice message "low battery warning". At first I thought it was my pager. Nope, I followed it upstairs. I turned on a light in our bedroom. That made Hubby get up are help find it. He was able to follow their noice to DS9's room where he dounf the detector (I did not realize there was one there.)

Mr. Coach..

2008-09-30T04:04:00.000-07:00

That's my Hubby in the glasses, deciding on a play for flag football. What's funny is that as a kid, he played one year of T-ball where he was picking dandilions in right field. In High school he was a memberof the tennis team. When He married me and I dragged him back to my hometown, he started playing softball. Our oldest son was signed up for YMCA Soccer and Baseball at about 4 years old. He watched and learning. He helped out the coaches as an assistant. I thin his first foray into head coaching was as a co-head coach for the oldest son's 4th grade intramural basketball team.

When our younger son, now 9 turned 4, he played soccer at the Y. Dad decided to sign up to coach. Then Dad signed up to coach t-ball. Then he started helping out with the Wrestling team. Parents frequently came up to me and expressed how much they like him as a coach. His Mom often sat beside me and beamed. Once he was asked by another coach what weight he wrestled in High school. That coach was amazed when he learned Hubby had only learned wrestling when our oldest so started the sport in the first grade. By Son's 6th year, guess who was the head coach. And he loves it!

Action picture of the 9 yo in his first Flag football game.

Be careful what you wish for..

2008-09-26T01:36:00.000-07:00

I'd love to elaborate, but I am also not willing to spill my guts right now. There is a tropical storm brewing at work. My employment is not in danger, but my current position is being brought into question. My ego is taking a pounding. However, there could be a good side to this.

So is a hurricane going to develop out of this or will the storm break up. Like the weather, it's hard to tell. There can sometimes be some blustering, however, this same question has been brought up before.

There could be some advantages. A lot of what I do, I would still do. There is a public relations aspect to my job that needs work. Do I still have the competitive spirit and drive to attain the skills, knowlege and abilities? I don't know. Now that I am not the main breadwinner in the family anymore, do I want to fade in the background more?

Sometimes the Almighty Father answers prayers in a way you don't expect. But then again I did not think my occasional fantasies of a less intense career were prayers.

A Post about nothing

2008-09-25T07:12:00.000-07:00

Oh how I wish I was full of witty posts that has people rolling in front of their monitors. I'd love to be another BooMama or a Mrs Dryer, But I just don't have it in me. Heck. Shalee is a Mom who works outside the home and she posts more regularly that I do.

I stead I give you pictures of my wind-ravaged home and my boys in their sports. But maybe because my life is pretty confined these days. I sleep, work and drive. I take time out to eat and use the bathroom. Take yesterday, I got up, showered and dresses, referred arguments between Whiney (the 9 YO) and Meanie (the ADHD 13 Yo who's meds had not kicked in yet). The 9 YO has been making things with Legos, He had a cars that was made out of DS13s Legos. the 13 YO demanded him Legos back. Yelling ensued until the bus pulled up. I did spedn 30 minutes on the home computer until it was time to pick up my carpool friend. I did have to stop and get gas. Then we came to work. Then we came home. Just as I am 3 minutes from Carpool friends house, Hubby calls me. he got out of work late. Was I closer to school to pick up the 9 Yo from after school care? Yes. So I go back and pick up the ( YO. In the meantime I call DS13 to tell him to eat before football practice and to be ready because i would probably have enough time to pull into the driveway, jettison DS9 to Dad's care and have DS13 climb in to take to football practice. (Lets do a time check: leave work at 3:45, pick up DS9 about 4:35, pull into the driveway about 5:08).

I drop off DS13, and go find the Kroger. I went to the second closest one because of traffic. I got a package of California rolls - Yum, Dinner) and juice boxes to send in for Ds9's class. I stop at Trader Joe's looking for Flax seed supplements. Then I decide to go to Whole Foods - it's another 2 exits up the expressway (yes a lot of my driving is my own fault..) I find Arnica Gel

I sit waiting for football practice to end for about 30 minutes. It's awful dark, but I guess the two little street lights are enough to do pushups and situps to. DS13 is hungry. Ok, it's 8:15, we've got a 15 minute ride home with a boy who procrastinates on his shower, getting something to eat at home would prolong my agony by 20 minutes at least. So it is a stop at McDonalds. Bu=oy are they busy. So I hand the boy some money. He goes in with $8 and comes back out with $5. Hey, not bad. We drive home. Ah, I can now kick off my shoes and change out of my work clothes.

So am I crazy to be starting a very expensive workout program? I am working with a personal trainer. Hubby is behind me. I have not been able to exercise for about 2 years. I have developed chronic tendonitis in my ankle due to my extremely flat feet. Working with the Podiatrist, I have a rigid brace that I am supposed to wear most of the time. Surgery is the next step. I don't like the idea of surgery so I want to work with a personal trainer to find workouts that won't aggravate my ankle. My goals for exercising are:

Stress relief
Stave off Diabetes for another 20 years
Of course it would be nice to drop some weight. (Goal is about 65 lbs)

So to find the time, I and going to work out at 5 AM Tues and Thurs and 7 AM Saturdays. Wish me luck...

Wind Damage to our roof

2008-09-20T17:41:00.000-07:00

This is what the Ohio Hurricane did to our roof.

Third day of school closings

2008-09-17T04:47:00.000-07:00

So since the big Ohio Hurricane school is closed for the third day in a row. The local media is billing this as the "Great Blackout".

Anyways, both my boys said yesterday that they were ready to go back to school. They are bored being home watching TV and playing video games. They miss their friends and the structure that the school day brings.

But they have another day to "build Character" and "strenghten their resourcefulness muscles".

A hurricane In Ohio?

2008-09-15T17:00:00.000-07:00

So somewhere over Cincinnati, the remenants of hurricane Ike collided with a Cold Front. As a Result, N KY, Cincinnati, Dayton, and Columbus got sustained winds of 40 MPH (I heard this is Tropical storm definition) and gusts of up to 80 MPH. 90% of Duke Power customers were affected. Of course they had sent many crews down to Houston. They have recalled them.

I feel really lucky. I was outdoors for a good portion of this. Why? I was working the concession stand at the Football game before my Son's. Our power was out once we got home. We were lucky that it came back up about 8:20 PM. Down the street, the traffic lights and the Gas stations are still out of power.

So at this point, my boys are off school again tomorrow. The newspaper said that school officials for thebig public school are not only considering the power out, but even if they had power back, the food they have is spoiled. they need to restock. How can they feed intercity kids, a portion who eat breakfast and lunch at school, until they get new shipments.

Gas is also getting scarce. Some of the Gas depots int he area are without power so they cannot pump gas into the tankers. I admit being a bit cavalier abotu emergency preparations. Most emergencies around here affect small area, like tornados. You can drive 10 miles or so and finds an area with power and such. Floods are usually confined to the area close to the rivers. A Blizzard would be the biggest disaster would would get.

So I need to do a better job of keeping batteries around, maybe several days of canned food, etc...

The Politics test -

2008-09-10T07:15:00.000-07:00

Link to the test: http://www.okcupid.com/politics

You are a
Social Liberal
(60% permissive)

and an...
Economic Conservative
(63% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Centrist

Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid
Also : The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Smells Like Pre-teen spirit?

2008-09-03T17:38:00.000-07:00

So I wrote about my 13 Yo not being consistent about using deodorant. Yesterday I picked up the 8 YO from his afterschool program. He tells me "Mom, I need deodorant. The hair on my arms is getting long."

As I chocked back (1) laughter and (2) "You're too young". I decided I would take advantage of his enthusiasm. If he wants to use Deordorant, I should nto stop him. Then he will be in the habit by the time "big boy stink" strikes. And 'Oh boy, there/s a Walgrrens right there.

He picked out Old Spice "Mountain Rush".

Strawberry Jam anyone?

2008-09-02T09:35:00.000-07:00

A couple of Weeks ago, the Man I pledged to stick to for better or Worse, called me. We are out of Strawberry Jam. I looked in the corner cupboard and there aren't anymore jars on the shelf.

Oh no! I did not get around to making a batch. I figured I still had plenty. So the local Mega -mart had an end of season sale on Strawberries. I stopped Friday night. They had been well-picked over, but my family deserves homemade strawberry jam. (I find it quite easy to make). I had to buy twice as much as I usually do because of all the unseable peices. I get home and start to pull out my empty jars. Hey, what's this? At the bottom of the cupboard are 7, yes Seven! jars of strawberry jam.

The Man is out on the lawn tractor, moving the weeds. I go out, Hold up the jar, then I tuck it under my arm and hold up 7 fingers. Then I turn around and walk back intot he house.

Yeah, he's right, it won't go to waste. But still, out of season strawberries. The Man cannot find things right in front of his face. I don't get it. After 15 years, I know he has a problem finding stuff.

Any my son wonders why last night, when he tells me he can't find his School Unifoprm Shirt, the I start diggind in his drawers. Yes, we found all 5.

I don't even eat strawberry jam.

Smells like Teen Spirit

2008-08-25T05:47:00.000-07:00

Ah, yeah. So Thursday the 13 Yo had Golf practice from 2-4:30. Meet the teacher night 4:15 - 5:45 and Football at 5:30. Meet the teacher became a victim. Fortunately, there are no new Junior High teachers this year.

I took off half a day form work to make this happen. I pick him up after Golf and he raised his arms. Oh my, Big boy stink. I knew after football was going ot be bad. I toyed with picking him up a new shirt and a stick of deodarant, but did not follow through.

So I quizzed him (while the AC was blasting to keep the air moving).
M: Did you use deodorant?
B:You mean before golf? no.
M: Did you put some on when you got dressed this morning?
b: No
M: (quite exasperated) Did you at least put some pn after you took a shower last night?
B: No

So how do you convince a boy that deodarant needs to be a crucial part of him morning routine?

Football update

2008-08-21T07:18:00.000-07:00

Last night I heard that the Defensive line got soame focused attention. A coach who has had conflicts lately was back. He organized the defense so that there was an orderly substitution of players and they all got equal time. Previously these 7th and 8th graders were left to their own initiative to sub in and out. This coach also got them fied up by offering Double cheeseburgers to anyone who sacked the QB. Hubby said these little guys were getting through and the offensive line took notice and stepped up their game. He said our 13 Yo got knocked down hard.

However, the 13 Yo came home pumped up. So that is good.

I am still miffed that he is doing 2 sports in one season. It stresses me out thinking about it. He'd better keep up with his homework. That will be a challenge.

Football

2008-08-17T16:22:00.000-07:00

Today was the season "Preview". They played for 20 minutes, rested for 20 minutes an dplayed another 20 Minutes. My 13 YO got in for three plays. Hubby got it on Video and I took stills. It was the second play before I set the camera to sports mode and just held the shutter button down.

We've been playingwith his meds. My Dad said he thought the meds made the 13 YO sluggish. This was his observation when the 13 Yo spent a week with his Grandparents. My ADHD brother commented that he did not get into sports until HS when he stopped taking meds. Last Wednesday I had him remove his Daytrana patch at 4 PM. So by 6 Pm he was ready to be aggressive. He did not removed it Thursday and he decided he could tell a difference. Saturday morings practice he attended unmedicated. When I got here he was walking in circles and looking up in the sky. He also took a bathroom break shortly after I got there.

This moring I decided to cut a third of the patch off before applying it. My 13 YO was mouthy (more so than usual) but he was tolerable. We'll see if he has any difficulties getting to sleep tonight.

Helping a 13 YO ADHD-er find motivation

2008-08-13T07:43:00.000-07:00

So Am I a bad Mom because I decided to use a modified format of a performance Improvement plan with my 13 YO?

Background: Football – Hubby observed him last night in warm up drills, getting out of line and working his way back to the end of the line to avoid hitting drills. Then, in the end of session sprints, He’s the first off the line, but the last one to finish and his body language is saying he is exhausted. (Hands on head, breathing deep) But we watched him spend the past 20 minutes standing watching the plays being run. No reason for the exhaustion. He’s not a whipped puppy when he gets into the car.

Last week we had a discussion about how his lack of effort is frustrating us and making us feel like we are wasting our time, coaches times, etc. Coaches are not going to spend the time with a kid who’s not willing to expend a lot of effort. I’m not willing to give up my free time driving him the 24 miles round trip to practice.

Part of what I sent him:

Here’s what we are asking for:
1. Give the drills your all. Stay in line, hit hard.
2. Dig deep for the energy to run. Start really conditioning yourself. Don’t just think about it.
3. Stop hanging around the end of the line in drills.

The other kids who are beating you in the sprints have been in on a lot more plays. You are more rested than they are.

If we don’t see this in the next week, we will no longer drive you to practice. If we are going to take the time to leave work early and utilize our free time, then you need to show us you appreciate it and really want to play football.

Your actions are telling me “I don’t really want to play football, I just want to be able to say I am part of the team.” That’s not good enough for me.

Think long and hard.
What are your goals?
What are you willing to do to achieve those goals?

We will put as much effort into helping you achieve your goals as you do. Right now with football, we are putting in more effort than you are.

Love, Mom.

Aaagh! I don't know if this will work. But he often says he does not know what the expectations are. So I put them in writing.

Update: We are going to have him tkae off his patch at 4:00 so his Meds wear off by the time Football practice begins. Let's see if that has any effect

teendom

2008-08-11T04:44:00.001-07:00

- Heavy sighs

- Huffing and puffing

- Smart alec comments

All good indicators that I have a teen ager in my house.

He’s really enjoying football. Thursday they had a scrimmage. He was on Defense B. He lined up across form the center. (I was later informed that this is the nose guard. My cousin played center, so I know the real name and no longer call it “the guy who hikes the ball.”). But he’s one of the smallest guys in on the team. This Mom got a bit worried. He also got in on a few plays at Split end. He stayed late at Saturday’s practice for extra receiver practice.

Then yesterday he and Dad went and played Golf. They got pair up with two other guys who told B he should stick with Golf, that he has a great drive.

Thursday he has a pool party with his classmates Noon until 4 PM. Then golf practice at the driving range 4-6 and Football practice 6-8.

Gratuitious Vacation Pictures

2008-08-04T06:36:00.001-07:00

The Beach, Go Cart racing, Fishing, Relaxing, Driving Grandpa's boat.

Public Transportation

2008-07-16T06:05:00.000-07:00

Gas prices are outrageous. I don't want to pay them, so I have been taking the bus. So have a lot of the people in my area. Some days there are people standing the 30 minutes from the park and ride to dowtown.

I have to catch another bus downtown to go uptown to the University. Luckily there is an assortment of busses I can take. the one I usually catch is interesting. Full of interesting people. Fortunately, at 7:15 am, most are hard-working people going to or coming from work. Sometimes I feel like an imposter. But then again why should'nt I conserve my money to.

I have figured out that it takes me 2.2 gallons of gas to make the round trip to and from work. When gas is $3.95 a gallon, that is over $8 a day that I am saving. Oh yeah, bus fare costs me nothing with my University ID due to a deal between the University and the bus company.

I do hope I can continue to leave my car sit for at least 2 days a week once my boys start back to school. I think we will also not push the boys to sign up for wrestling this year unless they ask. The 13 miles to practice 4 days a week will really cost us in gas.

Water Skiing

2008-07-08T02:35:00.001-07:00

And He's up! We spent the Independence Holiday at Grandma and Grandpa's lakehouse. His comfort level has really increased.I think it helps that he watched Dad ski and make a face plant in the water.

What Happens when

2008-07-08T02:32:00.000-07:00

You leave park your bike behind Mom's car.

Dad decides you need a new bike.

Awkward age

2008-06-24T07:57:00.000-07:00

So I am a Mom who works outside the home. My 13 Yo is too big for daycare. He can take care of himself and doesn't mind staying home. Last year he had a friend up the street who's Uncle was staying with him, rehabilitating from surgery. The boys played together. They figured out that they could ride their bike 2 miles to the Outdoor Mall and many catch a movie or just a cookie. The Uncle knew where they were and was a bit of an anchor for them. They played outside a lot.

Then we moved. We have not met any boys close to his age in the neighborhood. It was stinkin' hot last August, so he stayed inside. In front f the TV, Computer or XBox. He got mopey. We started to worry. I tried to encourage him to ride his bike to the library or even McDonald's. But he would not. He was estatic when school started again.

So this year, I tired to sign him up for baseball camp for a week, and the sesion got cancelled. So then I saw an blurb about band camp at the high school in our church bulletin. I twisted his are to agree to go. But it is 9 am - Noon for 4 days. So 3 of those days, he is coming with me to work. Then at 8:30 I drop him off and pick him up at Noon. Then he spends the rest of the day hanging out in my office. This was him yesterday.

He's got the portable DVD player on his lap and he is text messaging a friend. Maybe tomorrow I'll see if I can arrange for a simple laptop with a browser for his to play some games on.

Today he spent time with Dad at Dad's office.

My Life this week

2008-06-20T02:20:00.000-07:00

Work and Baseball. The 13 Yo team won thier first game almost 2 weeks ago. Then they won another, and another. This week was the county tournament. We made it to the semi-finals. We did lose, but there was not a "Bad New Bears Inning" , Thier bats stayed hot even if they hit them right where the other team was standing (Sometimes contact with the ball is worth cheering for) and the pitching stayed good.

Summer activites

2008-06-16T10:05:00.000-07:00

School's out. It's been out for a bit over a week. The boys pooled their money and Dad chipped in and they got The Lego Indiana Jones game for the Wii. The have completed all levels. They have been putside a bit. Grandma and Grandpa are currently visiting and Friday morning Grandma made them read for a few hours.

Next week the 8 YO will begin Daycamp at a local daycare. He's not excited about it, especially since his brother will be at home with few restrictions on computer and TV time.

They were supposed to both do baseball camp this week, but it was cancelled. I did discover band camp at the Parochial HS DS13 will most likely attend. I had to twist his arm a bit. He was not oevrly enthusiastic about it. But at least it will introduce him to the band director there. And it will get him out of the house and some social interaction. It would be great if he could make Friends with people who live close to us.

He will most likely do Football camp instead of wrestling camp in July. They are the same week. He's not too hot on Wrestling right now. (One reason I want him to meet the band directors) However, He is planning on playing football for the very first time as an 8th grader. Maybe the week before football camp he can go to North Carolina with Grandma and Grandpa. He won't be able to go in August due to Football practices (6 days a week - ugh!). a few months after Football sign-ups, we got notice that there will be a golf team at the school this year. So he's signed up for it. I am confident that if there is a conflict with Golf and Football that Golf will win out.

Baseball is still on-going. We have some rainouts to make up. DS 13's team has played 11 games and won 2 of them. Both wins were against the same team. It feels like the coaches have given up. These boys often mis basic plays. They always seems to have a "bad news bears" inning. We know the mercy rule all too well.

DS8's team has yet to win a game. But they are still hainvg fun unlike DS13's team. Tuens out our son can throw a decent pitch for an 8 yo. The first three innings they use a pitching machine (or coach pitch when someone stole some generators for the pitching machine) and three iniings of kid pitch.

It has been a bit of a long baseball season.

Live Blogging

2008-06-03T18:57:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone, It's almost 10 PM and I'm still up. We've got severe storms coming through the area. The sirens have stopped, but we are still camped out in the basement. Never fear, I am on the laptop and it;s bettery. My power and cable are obviously still up and running. They are talking about 2 inches of rain per hour.

The 8 YO s in the corner, asleep in his bean bag chair. the 13 yo, Hubby and I are glued to the TV reports. I did grab an shorts, shirts and socks for the boys nad I. Hubby has not changed into his PJ's yet. LOL. But it's looking like we can relax a bit. But the TV just showed a line of storms going back West. It could be a bumpy night.

Who's toy is it?

2008-06-02T03:31:00.001-07:00

Dad's? Or the Boy's

I'm here - New Lawn Mower

2008-05-30T05:07:00.000-07:00

Hi all three of my readers... LOL! I feel like that's conceited of me.

I have a post in the back of my mind about the new riding lawn mower we got this week, but I have not taken a picture. It is kind of blowing my mind that Hubby and the boys are sooo excited by it. When I was in Third grade, we moved to this house that was on about 3/4 of an acre. The yard was naturally divided up into 4 sections: The front, the back, the back-back and the pool. The back yard was divided by a set of hedges that had a large opening leading to the large in-ground pool. But there was a whole othr yard behind and around the pool.

We usually had 2 working riding lawn mowers. It seemed like we were cutting grass all the time. Hubby loves to cut his grass. I was only allowed to cut the front when he physically could not walk. He has always had a small lawn and could make it look "perfect". I'd mow one way and then turn and mow a different way when I got bored. The last of pretty rows drove him nuts.

So the new riding lawn mower arrived Thursday evening. He stayed home for the 13 YO's baseball game to mow because the grass was rather high. Last night he was golfing. I looked out my kitchen wndows and noticed that there were rows in the gras, side-by-side. I was expecting a circle. He did make a comment that he did not cut it in the most efficient manner. The 13 YO and I had a good laugh imagining him cutting perfect rows with the tractor.

8 YO's Thank You notes

2008-05-16T05:38:00.000-07:00

Dad, Mom and the First Communicant

2008-05-14T03:23:00.000-07:00

Congratualtions to my 8 YO. We are proud!

They know...

2008-05-08T09:26:00.000-07:00

Eithr my appliances are sentient or Mr. Murphy of Muprhy's law fame is paying us a visit. My Oven is on the fritz. Mr. Heating and Air (and thus expert in gas pilot lights and all, took it apart and diagnosed a worn out ingnighter coil. And of course, it's not anything the local Sears harware and Appliance store stocks. While he was looking for the part he looked at new Gas ranges. We had a discussion before he left of repair or replace. I said repair and he wanted to know if I was sure. It would sure be nice to have a 5-burner model with a griddle.

When he left he was thankful. Turns out new ranges with the features we'd like to have start at 50 -100% more than what he though they did. So the ignighter coil is being replaced.

So why Murphy's law? DS8 Makes his First Communion at Saturday night Mass. We are having a party with Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and GodParents. Fortunately I think I can make everthing I planned on the stovetop...except the cake. I guess I'll be ordering one from the bakery.

Old Hat

2008-05-06T10:50:00.000-07:00

So Yesterday I attended my 13 YO ADHD-er's IEP meeting for next school year. This was the first one I have experienced this school year. I got to finally meet, in person, the school psychologist who has been working with the 8 YO on his social skills. From the feedback provided by the Jr. High teachers, the 13 Yo is also struggling socially. But anyways, it was interesting. They decided that "yes, he still qualifies for services". There has not been a big imrpovement in his organizational skills and I think he's regressed a bit since last year. I suppose that's not a huge surprise considering he changed schools.

I talked about our busy schedule and how every October we see a deterioration in behavior form him and we have concluded that it coinsides with the time between sprts. There has typically been a 5 to 6 week gas between sports at the time of the year. Also, the days are getting shorter and it's harder to give him enough exercise to burn off some excess energy. I think the group found it interesting to hear me say that.

I have to say that I disagree with the Math teacher's assessment that he is a B-C student. I think he's lazy. But then I did not see eye to eye with her in the Fall when she complained that he reads a book in Math class and then in the next breath tells us he's already had the material. Can somebody please turn on the lightbulb? However, when I talk to her last week about an incident, she was kind a reassuring that he just needed a little maturity. I appreciated that.

I had to giggle, the Social studies teacher found that he "was surprisingly prepared for class in spite of how unorganized he appears."

So what's a Mom to do? We have tried many methods of organizing and tracking of assignments. I feel like we have given him the tools now he needs to work with the tools. He's not willing to do that to a large degree yet. He has not found the motivation yet. I tried to provide inspiration by offering him money for grades. But that was not as successful as I hoped.

It took my brother until he was 25 to get his act together. Can I survive 12 more years? I guess my Mother survived.

Menu Plan Monday

2008-05-05T10:07:00.000-07:00

- So Org Junkie's Mr. Linky is huge, So I feel it might be pointless to post my link. However, Planning my meals is helpful.

Mon - Pork Chops, green beans, Buttered noodles
Tues -
Wed - I am going to make Mac and chees and brown some hamberger in it and make a casserole.
Thurs - Just me and DS8 - We'll dig for leftovers
Fri - Homemade Pizza
Sat - DS8's First Communion Party - Roast beef and or roasted Turkey Breast Sandwiches, Cheesey potatoes, raw veggie platter, fruit salad, deviled eggs, Layer salad.

Am I available to....?

2008-04-30T05:10:00.000-07:00

No, Not really. Those open Monday nights will be "Save Mom's sanity" nights. And Of course, the one night we are double-booked? Hubby has an out-of-town business trip planned.

An ADHD Morning

2008-04-29T06:54:00.001-07:00

Monday Morning was a great example of an ADHD morning. My now 13 YO was in rare form. He must have stayed up late reading or playing Gameboy. I woke him up at 6 AM and put his patch on. At 6:10 and at 6:15 I called up to him to get moving. He finally shows his face, dressed (I doubt that his teeth were brushed in spite of the fact that he put a sticky note on the mirror in his bathroom that says “brush teeth”).

He was loud and obnoxious. Singing and other random noises were coming from him. Of course this upsets the 8 YO who repeatedly asks him to “Quit it!” Ah, that’s only fuel for the fire. I encourage him through eating his breakfast and packing his bag. I reminded him 3 times to get his gym clothes. He argues with his brother over the size of their brownies for snack time. He’s angry that he loses and puts his face up to his brother’s and scowls. Sometimes he takes a swing at his brother stopping (usually) just before hitting him. So I have two upset boys.

Time to go outside and wait for the bus. Oh, he has to run back upstairs to his bedroom for something. But it sure wasn’t his gym clothes. So back up he must go.

By this time. The 8 YO collected his brains and went outside to avoid the line of fire. I finally get the 13 YO out there and of course he is still singing very loudly and the 8 YO keeps telling him to “Quit it!” I want to apologist to my neighbors. It’s 6:45 AM. The bus comes and I breathe a sigh of relief, they are somebody else’s problem for now. How awful is that?

Apparently a day a couple of weeks ago, they did not stop the bickering when they got on the bus and both got written up.