I don't feel at all successful. The unthinkable has occurred and my husband no longer wants to be married to me. We have had our differences, but I did not realize how deep they went. I am not sure he did either until he started to talk to a counselor about the severe stress he was under for the last 7 months. I am sad that he did not realize it and let me know until it was too late. He does not want to turn back now. Like he says, we were both at fault. There were things we wanted the other to do differently but for some reason neither of us were capable of making the requested change. I have moved out. I was looking forward to downsizing from the house when the 17 YO graduated. I have no interest in maintaining the yard. I worked really hard at being strategic with the things I took with me. My favorite Christmas decorations and craft & sewing supplies are the things overwhelming me right now.
On top of all of this, my contract position is ending in a few weeks. The people I work directly with are unhappy, but HR is forcing this. I have to be away for 3 month before I can come back with another contracting firm and the department has no headcount to hire me. There might be opportunities for another project whit my current contract company. I am praying for continuous employment. I really do not want to ask for support from my estranged husband.
I found and attended a support group for newly single Catholics at the parish closest to my new apartment.
So far I am resisting the slide into anger and bitterness over it all. But the struggle is real.
I have things put away in the new apartment with the exception of the bedroom and large walk-in closet. I have purged a lot of things.
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