Band Parents

Band Parents

Friday, September 29, 2006

My Friend's Birthday

Happy Birthday to my friend Lily! I met Lily when we both went to work for the same larger Oil company in the big Windy City fresh out of college. We were in new hire class together. It was Lily that introduced Hubby and I. Her boyfriend (now Hubby) went to High school with my Hubby. Now they have tow beautiful little girls who are have Chinese and half Polish and all American.


Lily would love to be a SAHM. She’s one of those who volunteers for everything. I love her to death even when she’s a bit flighty. She has the biggest heart. But she works outside the home. She has a corporate job. Her Hubby has been a free-lancer since he sold his business about 10 years ago. When her oldest was born, she traveled a lot for business. I know it killed her to be away from her babies. As a result she is rather indulgent to them. Her hubby is a good father and present.  


One time, I let a less than positive comment slip about something she was doing with her baby. I felt so bad. It was none of my business. She was doing what she felt she needed to do to maintain a strong connection to her baby. She needs to hear that she is a good Mom. Now I try really hard to tell her that all the time. I comment on how beautiful her girls are and to keep up the good work.


Life, circumstances and spouses often pull us away from doing what we are told is “best” for our kids. What’s best for our kids is not what’s always best for the entire family.  As Mom’s we try hard to do everything right.  It is very gratifying to hear someone telling us we are doing a good job. We fight the doubts and the insecurities.  Everyone needs to hear that they are being a good Mom.

1 comment:

4andcounting said...

I'm a mom too, four kids at home. You are so right about needing to hear positive comments about being a mom. We women can be so hard on ourselves (especially us Catholic women) and it is good to hear someone else give us a break. I struggle daily with setting realistic expectations for myself and meeting them and being content, rather than critical.